Can someone lend me a listening ear? I really need one right now. Im really afraid that I could just go crazy about this. Yes, I apologize for what I have did in the past, being so childish, not thinking of how you feel and stuffs like that. Not only for you, but I apologized to the others too. But seriously, as I get more into this situation, everything seems to goes wrong. I'm already trying to change. I'm trying really hard, can't you see that? I guessed I didn't put in much effort. But at least, I've tried. I swear, i did. Tired is the only word I could express through my feelings. What if one day, I really couldn't stand it. I'm really scared that I would just do all kinds of mad stuffs. I'm trying not to think about it. But... Things just doesn't get into the right way. Burying all this stuffs by listening to xiaogui's songs, watching videos and stuffs. I know I can't hide with all this things forever. We have faults. But put yourself in my shoes. Last minute decision makes an happy occasion turns out to be a sad one.. I'm not trying to blame anyone. I'm just saying about my feelings. I just need someone to understand me. Nobody could. Nobody did . Nobody cares. But at least, I have a place for me to express all my thoughts and opinion. I love my blog. I know I'm a coward, writing stuffs at Internet and not facing the reality. Maybe, that's just me, a coward. I'm sorry.